“I’m sorry” is such a powerful statement spoken with just two little words. By uttering this phrase, the orator takes responsibility, expresses remorse for a transgression, and an implied request for forgiveness is made. We also often use this phrase to express empathy for another person (e.g., I’m sorry…for your loss; …for the difficult circumstances you’re facing; etc.)
Giving and Receiving Forgiveness
Today, I want to focus on the use of the phrase in the context of requesting forgiveness. “I’m sorry”, when used in a heartfelt manner to truly express contrition can repair a bond in a relationship that was severed or damaged by an action or inaction by one or both parties. It can also release a lot of pent-up negative emotion around a situation. Many times one voiced “I’m sorry” can lead to a reciprocal utterance. However, a speaker’s intent should not be to evoke reciprocity. “I’m sorry” isn’t a contingency statement. “I’m sorry” should either be followed by why YOU are sorry or a period, not “if you are also sorry for what you did.”
Why am I focusing on forgiveness? Because this is a topic that frequently arises in a psychic medium reading. Sitters often want forgiveness for some misdeed or desire an apology from their loved one for his / her behavior. Although it can be handled from across the veil, it’s easier for communication to happen while both parties are walking on the earthly plane.
I’ve written about forgiveness before in this blog, but as Americans look forward to Thanksgiving next week, I found I wanted to write about it again—this time specifically from the side of requesting forgiveness.
In the coming weeks, many people will be gathering with family—some of whom are only seen infrequently. When you’re around people with blood ties, but no day-to-day interaction, finding common ground can be tricky. Sometimes even topics you think are “safe” might become contentious. Sometimes old hurts or misunderstandings can rise to the surface, and sometimes the eruption isn’t very pretty.
Taking responsibility for your actions can be especially difficult if you feel your actions were actually a REaction to something the other person said or did. It’s hard not to figuratively dig in your heels and harden your heart against the person when you feel you are “right”. It’s hard to acknowledge to yourself that MAYBE you didn’t react in the best manner and much easier to claim blamelessness. It’s easier to focus on your perspective that the other person attacked you and you were just reacting to the attack, therefore, as the victim, you hold no blame.
Like many of you, I struggle with forgiveness from time to time. Especially when I feel the other individual is 100% wrong. However, I try to look at arguments from the perspective of the other person and I ask myself, “Do I have anything for which to be sorry? Have I done anything that warrants an apology?”
I base the decisions in my life on perspectives from a lot of different sources—Spirit, books, family /friends, studying the Bible, etc. When I struggle with how to forgive, a couple perspectives surface:
- To communicate effectively with spirit, it’s crucial to maintain a heightened, light vibration. Anger is a negative and lower vibration emotion. Holding onto anger makes it more difficult to connect with the spiritual realm.
- God is pretty clear about His perspective on forgiveness throughout the Bible. One of the verses I’ve recently studied doesn’t provide a lot of wiggle room.
“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”
-Ephesians 4:32, King James Version
When I consider these perspectives and many other sources about forgiveness, the bottom line is that there is no benefit from holding onto anger or resentment—only negative repercussions.
Raise Your Vibration
Forgiveness isn’t always easy—especially when the actions of the other person were egregious or hurtful and the other person has no remorse for their actions. However, as you gather with family and friends for the upcoming holidays during the next several weeks, I encourage you to consider softening your heart to give and request forgiveness. Giving or receiving forgiveness can help you move beyond heavy energy that is holding you back. Even if the actions of another are “unforgivable”, letting go of the hurt will help raise your vibration. The lighter you are, the happier you will be.
Don’t forget to forgive yourself. Many of us tend to be highly critical of ourselves. Apologizing to ourselves and forgiving ourselves can be very cathartic
I wish you much love!
I really need this as I feel stuck. I know I need to forgive to be able to move forward. I know my mom has been trying to reach me but holding on to all of mean hateful unforgiving attitude has prevented her and others from coming through to just say “hello” has stopped that as well as other opportunities on this side of the veil. Mama I forgive you, please forgive me! I will say it until I can stop crying knowing that you can feel it and move on too! Your daughter, Lillie
Thank you so much for your comment, Lillie! I definitely wrote this as much for myself as I did for all of my readers. I, too, am struggling with forgiveness right now.
Ironically, a miscommunication with a friend over a minor issue necessitated an “I’m Sorry!” on my part today as well. Luckily, this second case was a minor issue, but posting today’s blog reminded me to request forgiveness immediately.
Thank you for reading our blog! Much love to you.